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From an ex-field sales/support survivor:

I used to work in a computer store and one day we had a gentleman call in with a smoking power supply. The service rep was having a bit of trouble convincing this guy that he had a hardware problem.

Service Rep:  Sir, something has burned within your power supply. 

Customer:     I bet that there is some command that I can put into 
              the AUTOEXEC.BAT that will take care of this. 

Service Rep:  There is nothing that software can do to help you with 
              this problem. 

Customer:     I know that there is something that I can put in... 
              some command... maybe it should go into the 
              CONFIG.SYS. 

              [After a few minutes of going round and round] 

Service Rep:  Okay, I am not supposed to tell anyone this but there 
              is a hidden command in some versions of DOS that you 
              can use.  I want you to edit your AUTOEXEC.BAT and add 
              the last line as C:DOSNOSMOKE and reboot your 
              computer. 

              [Customer does this] 

Customer:     It is still smoking. 

Service Rep:  I guess you'll need to call Microsoft and ask them for 
              a patch for the NOSMOKE.EXE. 

              [The customer then hung up. We thought that we had 
              heard the last of this guy but NO... he calls back 
              four hours later] 

Service Rep:  Hello Sir, how is your computer? 

Customer:     I called Microsoft and they said that my power supply 
              is incompatible with their NOSMOKE.EXE and that I need 
              to get a new one.  I was wondering, where can I get it 
              done and how much it will cost.. 

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