UNITED PRESS INTERNATIONAL Mountain View, CA - A plot has recently been discovered which has as its objective the elimination of people with long last names. Since people often use their last name as their login names, Sun has disabled biff for folks with login names of 8 characters in length. The obvious goal is that these people will miss their important mail, thus losing their jobs, where they are finally forced to become homeless people forever roaming the back alleys of Vons stores. This heinous plot, which discriminates against those who are nominally verbose, is believed to be the brainchild of Mr.- short-name himself -- Bill Joy, who has been known to scoff at users who need to hit more than 4 keys to type in their user name (including the carriage-return). This bug has of course been reported Sun, but the honest programmers are helpless to fix it, because they will lose their jobs if they do not subscribe to methods of the this most evil of conspiracies. [the part about the bug in in.comsat (biff) is true; the rest is fiction]
(From the "Rest" of RHF)