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This .plan file is my creation, and it actually resides on my account at ccmax@eel.cs.ucla.edu The account I'm using to send this mail to you cannot (in my opinion) contain this .plan file because I doubt that the School of Engineering here at UCLA will appreciate it.

I am assuming the reader is familiar with the C language. You may decide whether it is a bit too sexist and ROT13 it.

So anyways, here's the file ...

PREFACE: I am trying to write a program that enables computers to engage in sexual intercourse with a willing and able partner (over a LAN or the Internet?). In order for me to do that, I must first teach the programmers writing this code what SEX is. That can only be done in C (C++ version coming out soon). So, here it is, excerpts from the book titled: "SEXX, a brief practical introduction."

Also available are:

1) "SEXX - programmers' HANDbook."
2) "SEXX - programmers' guide."
3) "SEXX - programmers' tools."
4) "SEXX - programmers' manual."

(c) 1990 - Maxx Kisslick's Software Series.

---------------- page 15 ----------------

#include "people.h" 
#include "items.h" 
#include "places.h" 
#include "personalities.h" 

procedure sexx( ListOfPeople, ListOfItems ) 
  person *ListOfPeople; 
  item	 *ListOfItems; 
{ 
  person *PARTNER1 = ListOfPeople, 
	 *PARTNER2 = ListOfPeople->nextVictim; 
  sexual position;	/* sexual is, of course, a special type */ 
  money  wallet; 
  int i; 

  if ( LENGTH( ListOfPeople ) == 1 ) { 
      if ( PARTNER1->sex == MALE ) { 
	   if ( SEARCH( ListOfItems, SexDoll ) == TRUE ) 
		ENJOY( PARTNER1, ArtificialT*ts, ArtificialP***y ); 
	   else 
		ENJOY( PARTNER1, YourHand ); 
      } else {			   /* if it's a FEMALE */ 
	   if ( SEARCH( ListOfItems, Vi***tor ) == TRUE ) 
		ENJOY( PARTNER1, GoodVibrations ); 
	   else 
		ENJOY( PARTNER1, YourFinger ); 
      } 
  } else if ( LENGTH( ListOfPeople ) == 2 ) { 
      if ( PARTNER1->sex == MALE  &&  PARTNER2->sex == MALE ) { 
	   printf("AIDS ALERT, AIDS ALERTn"); 
	   if ( SEARCH( ListOfItem, Condoms ) == TRUE ) { 
	       ENJOY( PARTNER1, PARTNER2 ); 
	       ENJOY( PARTNER2, PARTNER1 );  /* 2 wants to be on the top */ 
	   } else { 
	       printf("No glove no Love!?n"); 
	       ENJOY( PARTNER1, PARTNER2 );  /* only once this time */ 
	   } 
      if ( PARTNER1->sex == FEMALE  &&	PARTNER2->sex == FEMALE ) { 
	   position = 69; 
	   ENJOY( PARTNER1, PARTNER2->tongue || PARTNER2->finger); 
	   ENJOY( PARTNER2, PARTNER1->tongue || PARTNER1->finger); 
      } else { 
	   /* Finally, some good, 'old fashioned' heterosexual sex. */ 
	   /* Also, (PARTNER1->sex == FEMALE) - "ladies first," right!? */ 

	   switch( PARTNER1->PersonalityType ) { 
	      case NONE:   goto( HOME );  /* She ran away, you're too ugly */ 
			   break; 
	      case NUN:    goto( HOME );  /* Might as well */ 
			   break; 
	      case WHORE:  wallet = wallet - $50;  
                             /* Or whatever the going rate is these days? */ 
			   goto( MOTEL ); 
			   ENJOY( PARTNER1, PARTNER2 ); 
			   break; 
	      case PRUDE:  for(i=0; i < 10; i++ ) { 
			       goto( DINNER ); 
                               wallet -= $50; 
			       say("I Love you, dear"); 
			       give( GoodNightKiss ); 
			   } /* Wow, that was more expensive than the whore */ 
			   goto( YourPlace ); 
			   ENJOY( PARTNER1, PARTNER2 ); 
			   break;    /* break up and find someone better */ 
	      case CAUTIOUS: 
			   goto( DINNER ); 
			   talk( PreviousSexLife ); 
			   lie( Haven'tHadSexFor2Years ); 
			   goto( YourPlace || MyPlace ); 
			   ENJOY?? ( PARTNER1, PARTNER2, WithGloveOn?? ); 
			   break; 
	      case CONFUSED: 
			   goto( DINNER ); 
			   say( "Lets just be friends" ); 
			   GetHerDrunk(); 
			   goto( YourPlace );	/* because she's too drunk */ 
			   ENJOY( PARTNER1, PARTNER2 ); 
			   break; 
	      case MentallyDisturbed: 
			   ENJOY( PARTNER1, PARTNER2 ); 
			   goto( MentalHospital ); 
			   LockHerUp(); 
			   ThrowAwayTheKeys(); 
			   break;   /* and make sure she stays there */ 
	      case WildNkinky: 
			   goto( RESTAURANT );	/* To eat, but not dinner */ 
			   Quickie( UnderTableInRestaurant ); 
			   Quickie( InTheCarInFrontOfThePoliceStation ); 
			   goto( YourPlace || MyPlace ); 
			   Quickie( OnTheRoof ); 
                           position = 70;      /* guess what that is? */ 
                           ENJOY( PARTNER1, PARTNER2 ); 
			   break;              /* Exhausted, taking a break */ 
	      case DOMINATRESS: 
			   if ( SEARCH( ListOfItems, WhipsNchains ) == TRUE ) 
				ENJOY( PARTNER1, PARTNER2->TiedUp  ); 
			   else goto( HOME );	  /* No pain, no gain!! */ 
                           break; 
	      case ValleyGirl: 
                           say( "OhMyGod, like I'm such a stud" ); 
                                                    /* Valley English?! */ 
			   say( "Lets go to my Bel Air Mansion" ); 
			   ENJOY( PARTNER1, PARTNER2 ); 
			   break;  
              case ENGINEER: 
                           take( PARTNER1, Plastic surgeon ); 
                           take( PARTNER1, WeightLossClinic ); 
                           wallet -= $1000; 
                             /* if the above somewhat improved her looks */ 
                           if ( PARTNER1->looks > 0 ) then 
			        ENJOY( PARTNER1, PARTNER2 ); 
                           break;  
              case GlenCloseType: 
              case KathleenTurnerType:  /* If have seen the War of the Roses */ 
                           RunLikeHell();  
                           break;       /* hopefully not your neck */ 
	      case NORMAL: printf("You are out of luck!!n"); 
			   printf("A normal woman is an oxymoronn"); 
			   break; 
	      case OfTheMissingCase: 
			   say("Give me a light, NO ... Bud Lite"); 
			   say("Tastes Great, Less filling..."); 
			   break; 

	      default:	   ENJOY( PARTNER1, PARTNER2 );  /* enjoy anyways */ 
			   printf("Anyone who has new cases, let me known"); 
                           printf("I am ccmax@eel.cs.ucla.edu n"); 
	   } 
      } 
  } else			 /* when there are more than 2 people */ 
       ORGY( ListOfPeople, ListOfItems ); 
} 

funcktion ORGY( ); 
    /* See "SEXX - programmers' guide" for more details */ 

#include "guide.c" 

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