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Queen's Own Highlanders

jroberts@mts.net
(smirk, heard it)

On the eve of the Gulf War, Angus Greenblatt came doon frae' the
hills into Inverness to enlist in the Queen's Own Highlanders 
(Seaforths & Camerons). He presented himself before the Recruiting
N.C.O., and according to orders, receited his credentials. The
Warrant Officer nodded approvingly at his answers. Angus thought that he
he was in for sure.

Suddenly, the Warrant Officer slammed Angus' file folder closed, and
said: "Och lad, no go".

"wha'ts this, Sar't Major?" asked the perplexed Angus.

"We canne ha'e ye in the Yoonit," replied the Warrant.

"But why, Sarn't Major? " asked Angus. "Me family's lived in Scotland
since the '45, and me faither sairved in North Africa in the Black
Watch under Montgomery durrin Wairl Warr Twa. Why dinnae ye want me in
the Yoounit?"

"Ye're circumcised, isnae that kerrect?" asked the Warrant.

"Aye", replied Angus. "And tha's an oondeniable fact."

"Och, lad, then that's the reason".

Angus drew himself up to his full height, looked the Warrant Officer in
the eye, and said:

"Och. I can oonderstand that if a mannie wanted to join the Coldstream,
or the Welsh or even the Scots Guards that he'd have to have the 
"proper family connections", but this is the fiurrst I eveer heard that
ye had to be a complete pri** to get into the Queen's Own Highlanders."

(From the "Rest" of RHF)


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