Three women get together for coffee and the topic of conversation turns to contraception.

The first woman says "We've used the rythm method for years. The Holy Father approves of it and its surprisingly effective - it's only ever failed us twice"

The second woman says "Holy Father, Shmoly Father. We don't go for all that pious claptrap. We've always used the pill. It's easy, it doesn't rob us of our pleasure and it's only ever failed us once"

The third woman says We've always used the plate and bucket method. My husband and I met in the army and it was hard to get any private time with each other so we'd usually hide out in a closet somewhere. My husband, being shorter than me, would have to stand on a bucket. When I'd see his eyes get as big and round as plates I'd kick the bucket out from under him. It's never failed us."

Get The Internet Jokebook Featuring the very best of netfunny.com on dead trees.