Best of Jokes Current Jokes RHF Home Search Sponsor RHF?
Fun Stuff & Jokes
Previous | RHF Joke Archives | Next

Further UK Election Results

ambrosia@mail.telepac.pt (Steve Houghton & Cristina Cruz)
(topical, smirk)

You may have heard that there was a general election in the United Kingdom
last week.  You may not have heard the full story. In addition to the 10
parties which won seats, a further one hundred and fifty-eight parties
presented candidates. Some are from the left or the right, some are based
on special local issues, some are an anarchic strike against the system,
some are different...

I have listed below the parties which seem most interesting to me, with
results for some constituencies. My apologies for any omissions or counting
errors.

21st Century Independent Foresters            (Forest of Dean, 80 votes)
All Night Party                               (Hayes & Harlington, 135
                                              votes)
Berties Party                                 (Warwickshire North, 178
                                              votes)
Black Haired Medium Build Caucasian Male      (St Ives, 71 votes)
Common Sense Sick of Politicians Party        (Blackburn, 362 votes)
Glow Bowling Party                            (total of 711 votes in 5
                                              constituencies)
Happiness Stan's Freedom to Party Party       (Putney, 101 votes)
Hemp Coalition                                (Cities of London & Westminster,
                                              112 votes)
Juice Party                                   (Tatton, 73 votes)
Legalise Cannabis Party                       (Norwich South, 765 votes)
Logic Party Truth Only Allowed                (Hertford, 126 votes)
Miss Moneypenny's Glamorous One Party         (Tatton, 128 votes)
Monster Raving Loony Party                    (total of 7906 votes in 25
                                              constituencies)
None of the Above Parties                     (Hackney North, 368 votes)
People in Slough Shunning Useless Politicians (Slough, 227 votes)
Rainbow Dream Ticket Party                    (total of 3223 votes in 25
                                              constituencies)
Renaissance Democrat                          (Putney, 7 votes)
Rizz Party                                    (several constituencies
                                              including Hampstead, 101
                                              votes)
Ronnie the Rhino Party                        (Leeds North West, 232 votes)
Route 66 Party Posse Party                    (Swindon South, 181 votes)
The Mongolian Barbeque Great Place to Party   (Wimbledon, 112 votes)
Sub-genius Party                              (Brighton Pavillion, 125
                                              votes)
Teddy Bear Alliance Party                     (Kensington, 218 votes for
                                              candidate Edward Bear)

(For those unacquainted with the British electoral system, the country is
divided into 659 parliamentary constituencies, each with about 50000 to
80000 people eligible to vote. This time 71% of electors actually voted,
and the winning candidates usually received 15000 to 30000 votes. The votes
listed above may seem insignificant, but in one constituency, Winchester,
the Liberal candidate won the seat from the Conservatives by 2 votes.)

Collated by Steve Houghton <ambrosia@mail.telepac.pt> from data in The
Guardian newspaper, 3 May 1997.


(From the "Rest" of RHF)


Previous | RHF Joke Archives | Next

Best of Jokes | Current Jokes | RHF Home | Search