Just in time for Xmas!

pat@pat.net (Pat Niemeyer)

(topical, original, laugh, offense=Christians)

New, from Mattel...!

[ANNOUNCER]

New MIGHTY-MORPHIN'-JESUS action figures! With realistic healing and smiting action!

[VOICE OVER]

[child #1] "Aaannggg... Oh no! G.I. Joe is hit... Cobra leader is getting away!"

[whirring sound... Mighty-Morphin-Jesus' eyes light and head spins]

[child #1 in Jesus voice] "You are healed my son... now go forth and kick some ass."

[child #2 in G.I. Joe voice] "Thanks J-man., Let's go Joes!"

[ANNOUNCER]

Now you're in control... fight the forces of evil with new Mighty-Morphin-Jesus the action figure.

[Action shot of Jesus figure and He-Man battling Skeletor]

He's back from the dead and he's pissed.

[VOICE OVER]

[child #2 in Skeletor voice] "So Jesus, we meet again... will you never learn that evil is stronger than good?"

[child #1 in Jesus voice] "That may be, my unholy friend, but I know something even stronger!"

[Jesus figure transforms into dinosaur]

[child #2 in Skeletor voice] "No!... Jesusaurus!"

[Dinosaur tramples Skeletor and than transforms back into Jesus figure]

[ANNOUNCER]

Mighty-Morphin'-Jesus transforms into Dino-Jesus and back with just a twist!

Secret panel in Jesus' back holds water, manna, and grappling hook. (sold separately)

Batteries not necessary.

Also available, new Mighty-Morphin'-Moses and friends. Collect them all!