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A fellow retired and became bored.  He decided to go back to work.
He had always wanted to be a Police Officer and he had known the 
Sheriff for most of his life so....

The Sheriff says "I don't know about this, I'd better give you an
inteligence test.  How many days of the week begin with a 't'?"

Fellow says "Two. Today and tomorrow."
Sheriff: "O.k.  How many seconds in a year?"

Fellow:  "Twelve.  January 2nd, Feburary 2nd, March 2nd..."

Sheriff: "Who killed Abraham Lincoln?"

Fellow:  "I don't know."

Sheriff: "Go find out."

Fellow goes home.  His wife asks "How did it go?"

Fellow answers "Went just great!  Sheriff done give me a murder 
investigation!"

Assembled from spare parts by Tim Allen.
No, not HIM.  Tim Allen the obscure. 

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