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Of Microsoft and Manholes

mbk@lyapunov.ucsd.edu (Matt Kennel)
(chuckle, original, computers)

Legends have sprung up about the unusual questions that Microsoft's
recruiters sometimes seem ask during a job interview.  One of them, in
particular, is ``Why are manhole covers round?'' People have chimed in with
quite a variety of logical reasons, such as the fact that round ones can't
fall in the hole or perhaps that round ones may be rolled so construction
crews may schlep them from place to place---certainly a good reason
considering their weight.

Perhaps one of the best answers, considering Microsoft's line of business,
is of course, "because manholes are round."

Now given this I was surprised to hear on the net from a now unidentifiable
source that near Microsoft headquarters, the actual manhole covers in their
streets are square!

This rather baffled me, until I saw the light.  For the net's humble
amusement may I present....

Top 10 Reasons Why Microsoft's Manhole Covers are Square:

  10)  Shortened beta test cycle.

   9)  City got a special deal for bundling square manhole covers
       with their manholes despite the presence of superior alternatives.

   8)  Microsoft Street For Windows crashes on circles.  Tech support says
       Chicago has them working, denies copying Apple/Cupertino's round covers.

   7)  Construction company had to sign non-competition agreement barring
       street developers from any contact with Euclid.

   6)  DR-DOS found compatible with round ones.

   5) They make $49 dollars on each upgrade: 
       Manhole Cover 1.0:  the original. 
       Manhole Cover 1.1:  turned 90 degrees.
       Manhole 1.2: turned 180 degrees.
       Manhole 2.0 New Technology:  flipped upside down.

   4)  Perfect game piece for acting out those wacky
       Human Minesweeper tournaments.

   3)  Ziff-Davis publishing pushing new mag ``Square Manhole World''.

   2)  To prepare for Windows Everywhere: Windows For Manhole Covers.

   1)  Every single circle reminds The Bill of "O"-S-2.

(From the "Rest" of RHF)


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