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The Top Ten Recommendations for the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, and Firearms surrounding Koresh's commune in Waco, Texas:

10. Dig a deep pit, fill with water, stock with gators; ask Koresh to "come 
    on out and show us that walking thing again" 

9. Disguise a smart missile as a CNN mini-cam & send 'er in 

8. Have ATF agents begin assembling wooden crosses in view of compound 

7. "Hey!  Your pals Barrabus and Judas have stopped in!  Party time!" 

6. Have the US Air Force drop a relief shipment of Jack-in-the-Box catering 
   to them 

5. Woo children out for big hug by dressing ATF agents in "Barney the 
   Dinosaur" costumes 

4. Threaten to disconnect CNN uplink, interrupting flow of live interviews 
   to satellite network 

3. Tell Koresh he has a conference call with Oral Roberts and God waiting 
   on the outside line 

2. Provide Koresh with a love offering of a GM pickup "souped up" just for 
   him by Dateline NBC 

...and finally... 

1. Offer Muslim Extremists refund of van-rental security deposit for 
   providing their own special skills 

by Scott Chilcote & Esther Lumsdon

| Browse the Best of RHF: "Jokes about Current Events" |