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10-MONTH OLD CHILD CONDUCTS SLEEP DEPRIVATION STUDY ON PARENTS

In the sleepy city of Sherrill, NY, two unsuspecting adults have found
themselves the objects of sleep deprivation research.  James Harden is
currently in his tenth month of his study.  His subjects, Debbie and
Dennis Harden, have tried to foil his research to no avail.  "Ferber" has
failed and so has "The Family Bed."

Young James conducts his studies by awakening in the wee hours of the
morning, standing up in his crib, and screaming at the top of his lungs.
Sometimes a backrub from Mom will put him back to sleep, but other times
it takes the formula ritual.  Sometimes James is actually hungry but most
of the time he just wants to check how his research is going.

Just how far has he gone?  Last week James woke up too early -- his parents
were still up watching Letterman.  Dennis looked at his lovely wife and said,
"I can't take this.  I'm going to bed."  Debbie responded: "If you do that
I will kill you in your sleep."  Dennis went to get the baby.

Any non-Ferber advice or even sympathetic anecdotes are being requested by
these strung-out parents.  All other babies James age in this area actually
sleep through the night and have done so since they were 2 days old.  Or
their parents are outright liars.

____________________________________________________________________________
Debbie Harden                    It's easy to love a sleeping baby.
Rome Laboratory

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