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My father told me this tale some years ago; he said he heard it from a
colleague from work, and it might or might not have been a true story.

A young couple had a problem: they had invited another couple over for
dinner once or twice, and had since been plagued by regular visits from their
friends just before dinnertime. Wanting to be seen as polite hosts, they had
invited their uninvited guests to stay for dinner time and time again, but
had gradually begun dropping subtle hints that the friends might wait for an
invitation before stopping by again at such an inconvenient time. Their
friends, however, either too dense or too rude to get the hint, persisted.

Finally, they came up with a plan to get rid of them once and for all. The
next time their unwanted guests dropped by, once dinner was over, the couple
put their plates on the floor next to the table, and called for their pet
golden retriever to come and enjoy the scraps; their friends followed suit.
As goldens are always hungry and love table scraps, the plates were rapidly
licked clean. The husband stacked the plates carefully, and carried them
into the kitchen, where he casually put them back into the cupboard, in full
view of the shocked guests. The silverware followed suit, and the couple
offered their friends desert and coffee, but, looking a little green, their
guests declined, protesting committments at home or some such. Once their
guests had left, the couple (laughing hysterically to themselves) washed the
dishes properly, but that was the last time their friends appeared at dinner
uninvited.

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