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My SO heard this joke on the radio while driving home one day.

From an album called "Troubadour Emeritus" -- I wish I could remember the guy's
name.

One day, a cattle farmer heard one of his cows lowing out in the north forty
(the mudpit behind the barn). It sounded like she was in hard labor. He went
out, and, sure enough, it was a breech. He tried to turn the calf around,
but it was too late--the legs were already coming out. All he could do was
pull on the legs to assist in the birth. This field was right next to the
interstate, and a red MG stopped, and this woman (librarian type, with the
glasses and bun) jumped out and said, "Is there anything I can do to assist?"

The farmer said, "Yes, please! Grab a leg and pull!"

So they both pulled, and they were able to get the calf out. The farmer, very
grateful, said, "Wait a minute while I run back and get my wallet--I owe you
for this."

"Oh, no, I wouldn't dream of accepting any recompense for this service.
However, there is one question you can answer for me."

"Anything!"

"How fast was the little one going when it ran into the big one?"

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