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(Left on the blackboard by students in a Real-Time Systems course)

			How to program in "C"
			---------------------
1] Use lots of global variables.
2] Give them cryptic names such as: X27, a_gcl, or Horace.
3] Put everything in one large .h file.
4] Implement the entire project at once.
5] Use macros and #defines to emulate Pascal.
6] Assume the compiler takes care of all the little details you didn't
   quite understand.


"It's 5:50 a.m., Do you know where your stack pointer is?"


			How to debug a "C" program.

			---------------------------

1] If at all possible, don't.  Let someone else do it.
2] Change majors.
3] Insert/remove blank lines at random spots, re-compile, and excecute.
4] Throw holy water on the terminal.
5] Dial 911 and scream.
6] There is rumour that "printf" is useful, but this is probably unfounded.
7] Port everything to CP/M.
8] If it still doesn't work, re-write it in assembler.  This won't fix the 
bug, but it will make sure no one else finds it and makes you look bad.

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