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[The next joke must be read with an Eastern European-Jewish accent.  No
 flames, please - that's my ancestry and it adds to the joke.]

Mrs. Cohen, Mrs. Levy, and Mrs. Lefkovitz are discussing their sons.  Mrs
 Cohen says, "Now my Sheldon, what a man!  A world famous lawyer, he is, with
 big shot clients, a mansion in Beverly Hills, a summer home in Hawaii.  He
 has a beautiful wife, and everything a man could want in the world."

Mrs. Levy says, "That's nice.  Lemme tell you about my son Johnathan.  He
 is a doctor, a world-famous researcher.  He travels across the world on
 conferences, talks, lectures.  He was nominated for a Nobel prize in
 Medicine.  What a man!"

Mrs. Lefkowitz says, "My Hershel, he's an engineer.  Now, he makes maybe
 $35 000 a year, and he's not famous.  But his dick is so long, you can line
 up ten pigeons in a row on it."

The ladies sip their tea for a while.  Then, Mrs. Cohen says, "Actually,
 I got a confession to makes.  Sheldon's an up-and-coming lawyer in Los
 Angeles, but he doesn't have a mansion or a summer home.  He's a bright
 young man with a good future."

Mrs. Levy says: "Well, I got a confession too.  Johnathan is a good doctor,
and he got his share of scholarships, but a Nobel prizewinner, he isn't."

They all look expectantly at Mrs. Lefkowitz.

"Well, all right, I'll tell the truth too.  The last bird gotta stand on
 one leg."

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