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------- An ant and an elephant share a night of romance. Next morning the ant wakes up and the elephant is dead. "Damn", says the ant, "one night of passion and I spend the rest of my life digging a grave!" ------- A elderly man and woman are talking at a nursing home. Says the lady, "I bet I can guess your age." The man grins and agrees to let her try. "OK, pull down your pants", she orders. He complies. "Now pull down your shorts", she continues. Again, the old man does as she says. The old lady squints for a few moments, then announces "You're 92." Dumbfounded, the old man asks "How did you know that?" Says the lady, "You told me yesterday." ------- True story: A friend, Tim, was taking a computer class. He and another guy (call him Steve) were the only members of the class ever to do their programs. Everyone else just copied from Steve. One day in class the prof hands back programs. He asks Tim to go to the copier and make 20 copies of his program so everyone can see what a good job he did. As soon as Tim leaves the room, the prof says "I believe you all already have a copy of Steve's program." =============================================================================== = = = Jeff Roberts = = jeffr@ms.uky.edu "Wherever you go...There you are!" = = ^forgive misquote, but I prefer it this way, = = and anyway I never saw Buckaroo Bonzai. = ===============================================================================
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