I've figured out why NASA is having problems with Spirit, their Mars Rover.
See, Spirit is a juvenile male that is away from home for the first time. It sleeps all day. It can't hold a job. It stays up all night doing God knows what. It refuses to communicate except in short, unintelligible phrases. And it won't do a damn thing it is told to do. NASA, proud parent that it is, needs to just leave it alone. It will call home in a couple of weeks, when it needs money.