A friend of mine who owns a security buisness told me about this one..... Apon ariving at the office one morning, he found this message on his answering machine from the manager of a condominium complex .... "I would like to see that the guard who shit in the pool last night gets a raise."

After listening to it several times, he called the gentleman to find out what it was all about. After talking with him and the guard this is how the story went.

The condo had one man whose life job was to make everybody miserable in any way he could, that included the management and the security guards as well as the residents. One night the guard was making his rounds and found the asshole in the pool after closing time. He asked the man to exit the pool several times but got a quick F--k you as a reply.

The guard who was already tired of this guy's antics to the point that he didn't care about his job any more and was ready to quit anyhow, thought for a moment, turned around, dropped his pants, and shit in the pool. He then pulled up his pants and said, "have a nice evening." Of course the asshole went to the managers apartment and woke him up to complain. Thus the phone call.